Wednesday, 14 October 2020

The (G)Holden Ratio

As I emerged from the womb that is managed isolation I was reminded of something I learned working at sea.

In my experience, three out of four Kiwis are good people. If you have four on a boat usually one will be an odd egg. Starved of conversation, I rapidly indulged myself in banter with the mostly good people of Rotorua. I bandied words with a member of the Army who helped me with my bags.

I caught an Uber to a rental car location. The driver was very personable and was driving an electric car the same as my own. It was only a $7 fare but I squeezed that ride for every cent. 

The Gentleman at Hertz was a nice bloke. We commiserated about isolation. One of my thoughts earlier in the day was that a firm punishment in prison is to be given solitary confinement. I think a firmer punishment would be to be placed in a hotel room with an estranged partner or child for two weeks. 

Collecting my rental car I spent about 10 minutes reacquainting myself with the familiarity of being in the driver's seat, pairing devices, etc. Excuse me for sounding a bit posh but my last two car drives had been in S Class Mercedes strictly as a passenger.

I very conveniently had some familiar faces to spend some time within Rotorua before my flight so after setting up my GPS I pulled very gently out onto the road and started driving (sedately). Unfortunately, I was driving a bit too sedately for someone in a Golden Holden. I unintentionally had ruined his life by driving slowly in my embryonic state. He roared his engine and then did a strange maneuver which I guess would be equivalent to doing the fingers. 

I smirked to myself my ratio was proven correct.

And to be fair everyone who drives a Holden is a wanker.