It has been a while since I wrote you last, in fact I do not think I have written to you at all. But to be fair, you have not written to me either. I thought it was high time we opened an honest channel for communication.
I have not asked for much during my time within you. I have been a grateful steward of my body and instance of this dimension. However I am becoming a bit bored with the intermission between chapters of the rather large adventure. Obviously I am in the commercial break and need to fund my next chapter but the very mechanics of finding suitable employment is a strange beast.
I actually gave this letter a bit of thought last Friday and returned home to a job email that sounded exciting and thought we had connected without recorded correspondence. Alas it appears you were teasing me. I can think of far worthier people for you to play with. May I suggest George Bush will be looking for a job soon and is far more deserving of pranks.
So universe. The planet is in your court. It is your turn to play a card. I await a sign, preferably not one like this.